First blog post

First blog post This is your very first post. Click the Edit link to modify or delete it, or start a new post. If you like, use this post to tell readers why you started this blog and what you plan to do with it.

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First blog post

Welcome moms and daughters

It has always been my dream and passion to start a blog on single mom lives and daughters raised by single moms.The best title,we are basically super heroes.Join me in this journey where i will keep you enlightened,encouraged and equipped with ingredients for a purpose filed life of happiness as single moms and daughters of single mom.

True,there’s  nothing more rewarding than following my passion and making profit in it.I believe in building something i would love and experimenter too.Join me in this world

AUXILLIER NZISA

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MOTHERHOOD

I bet this is the craziest month and period of my life.

ROARS

It has been crazy moments and i thought it would be nice to share.Maybe this the best time am trying to be normal hehe.

Obviously theirs the whole me being pregnant thing,Today am officially 22 weeks pregnant which means ive got 18 more week to go!Holy crap.I’m going to have a nervous breakdown .

Am i not prepared🙄,There is so much to do ,i still have to run my business which i also think should take a leave early,what of the baby shower thing which has to be same day with my birthday..Yes all that have to be taken care of….guess what am excited but damn freaking stressed.

I have to plan on how il be working on a whole bunch of things on my own over the next couple of months.Seems there are alot of factors i have to consider

(1) What are my priorities now?

2)How much money can i do without?

3)Do i realy need to work full time?

I have in mind that motherhood today is a survival for the fittest.Everyone i come along has an opinion about what you should be doing,what they would do differently and why you doing it wrong.There is always someone better,someone more organized ,someone with a better plan and to that person you will always be doing it wrong.

This a feeling am learning to embrace each day,but when i check back at my mom,i remember thats to a childs ear,a mother is magic in any language and then the idea of being a mom at 25,running a busness,working and being a wife is ovewhelming me.Its true that motherhood is magical but more than that its spiritual.

At the moment my strength comes from heaven.I am braver ,more confident and becoming fearless in this journey.Its true ,il never be perdect but hoping this will be a one lifetime experience il embrace forever.

Its first motherhood chronicals😍😘😘

LETS TALK ABOUT IT

I had a rather unconventional childhood.I didnt spend most of my times with dolls as is expexted of ladies,always yearng for somthg.When i grew older i always felt i needed somthg for self discovery as a young lady.

After college reality hit me hard,you just 24 and alot is expected from you,the fear of motherhood,climbing up in your carrier path and more so society expectations.I sometimes get in to depression which leaves me alone and lost.I was trying so many things at once,not internships,not enterpreneurship and alot trying to prove something..

I was hindered by my deep_rooted limiting beliefs and couldnt understand what my purpose in life was,you become frustrated by so many people you love at this stage .Sometimes you feel guilty as a young lady of whether you worthy or not,not until you decide to embarm on a journey of self diacovery.

In order to move forward,i have learned to overcome my limiting beliefs that are holding me back in my state .Should i  make a difference and follow my dreams and more focus on personal development?A question asked by many,but i choose to discover if ladies at this stage were facing same issues unto my shock!!

1)We tend to be people pleasees which leads to exhaustion and a feeling of being overwhelmed as we constantly try to please those around us

2)Ladies at this stage tend to carry worry like its another personality sitting on their shoulders.

3)We often lack self worth and feel we are not good enough.

4)We fear dissapointing people and guilty walks with us day after day

5)We all want to accomplish something significant in the world  and make an impact as young people.

HENCE have learnt that to get where we want,we have to overcome self doubt and fear of unknown

Accept failure but turn rhe setbacks into learning opportunities 

Be self authentic

(The journey isnt easy ,but its worthy it)


I DONT KNOW WHERE IL BE IN 5 YEARS AND AM OKEY WITH IT

I’m sure and believe we all gotten this question from many,!not job interviews ,in  a classroom or even by friends.Personally am always pissed off by this question!We experience alot of pressure to know where exactly where we going in life and how to have a specific plan to get there.But honestly,the only reality with this is that it creates a very narrow experience which only leads to guilty and confusion if life doesnt end up following that path.

To me ,the answer to this question is simply a guess and if its wrong one can’t be a failure.It simply shows thats weve experienced change and growth which has led you to a place that makes more sense than what you may have guessed afew years ago.

But what happens when the plan gets too specific.One ,its not that one should’nt set goals for themselves,but when goals become too specific ,we often end up in dissapointments,for example every kid has that one vision of whom they want to be when they grow up and the society puts alot of pressure on it.!!Also a lady at 25 wants to have cleared college and already settled with mr right.when it doesnt happen frustrations crops in.

But in all ,i as a person,how do i view my future,Rather than creating a definate path for my future,i always go with the idea of setting goals based on my overal well being.For example accomplish my goals,look how far have come and applaud it and all get genuine satisfaction in all i do.I hope to improve the ability to listen to my instincts because have learned just how far that can take me.

It’s completely fine to not have your life figured out, I’m pretty sure most people don’t. Enjoy the present moment, get to know yourself and be curious to try new things that excite you. In the end, we are all trying to find our way.

Make it or fix it yourself

Ever since i was little,i always had the idea of the type of woman i wanted to be when i grew up.thats the”successful,smart,perfect and pretty.Thats when i developed this craving for fashion and the need to get on top.

This perfect woman i had imagined in my head was no longer someone i could pretend  being,”most times we try to be someone who is always on trend with everythg,thats the need to be a certain way.Woop!the reality hits me that i dont want to be like everyone else but making my own choices and creating my own style.

Howerver i still get ideas in my head that i should be a certain way ,i more spend time doing things that actually matter to me.There are things we are told or (want) to be able to do,thats being the woman who looks good without any real effort.

At this age,am learning to love myself and everythg that came with the real woman that i genuinely am has taken time and alot of soul searching,especially in this world which is continoully trying to sell me to the version of her of which in reality we know that doesnt exist but the real you does.

Its at this age of mid 20s where we have alot of expectations ,aspiring to be a first time mom,and tackling our jobs and business.I wish someone i respected would have impressed on me that im’ not going to know everythg,il always say listen to your voice inside you when it comes to making decisions,the rest will work itself out.

Its a world where we we feel we not worthy enough,we still look in the mirror and start dealing with deep childhood printing.!!

   …what a world! Self discovery

Does Any One Else Think Its Weired that Today Morning I realised Dark Beauty Outstands

Being a dark lady is one of the joyous and beauty aspects of a true african woman….and it can also be your worst night mare.So its in the morning before i leave for work and i take a last self look through my mirror,!!a question i pose,Are you truly happy with where your in life now and the embracing your beauty? Thats something we having issues embracing with todays world of beauty.Every lady seems to alter their appearance i this century,who said dark isn’t beautiful and appealing?Again i ask myself,Does todays girls fear of being dark hinder their success?I sigh and take a deep breath, Its always good to appreciate who we are,who cant see that most celebrated models are dark and we less prone to many skin problems.until for the third time,I pass through our neighbours door and the daughter shouts again,,siz come see the most dark and lovely lady i love.that puts a smile on my face and gives me that connfidence i always have for myself. With just a little make up and smile our flawless skins glow and that african beauty sparks the atmosphere.In my own journey to self-acceptance and self-love I have come to love and appreciate my dark skin, so we should all as a community. Have a look at this

Self

Time passes and doing what you love makes one have a content for each next day. Looking deep in the inner soul, we embrace ourself and what we love most. So think of today touching on some simple fashions that makes my day super great.

When you have that dark chocolate complexion, it’s always good to blend the appearance with some bright stuff. Yes am in love with some dark colours but trying my best to bring out that damn look.

Get a simple pair of jeans, some nice cool sneakers and let me know if it brings out that classy cool look. When you are comfortable with how you look and dress, the confidence in you inspires many and that’s what nature is all about.

Facing the society

I believe everyone was put in this earth to be whittled and sand papered down until what’s left is who truly they are. But let’s look at the society and single moms, they always labeled and everyone seems to have opinions about them.

I hope you never reduced to the point where you a single parent, because then you will know. Look at the society, what do people think when they see a single mom. They only see the label, they judge and then carry on with their days.

Single moms are great people, most caused by a sudden change in life, others by choice. Let’s ask, Is it realy the case that single mothers are any less capable, any more feckless, than a couple who have children and not bother to raise them properly. Am not trying to justify single moms should be encouraged, but it has to be embraced.

I can’t stand it when people think it’s okey to question single moms’ life, like for example, how did one manage to gain so much as a single mom?what’s realy the implication? My dear people let us see single moms as normal people.

Sometimes a single mom gets angered and asks, why get bothered about the social stigma? Why be bothered what people think? Why not just get their head down and get on with life? You wonder but then its is you, labeled as a single mom.

The society most denigrates the effort that goes into being a single mom. They are most treated as second class. People forget, many men dissapear from child’s life and make little or no effort to remain a father figure once the relationship with the mother is dissolved. Sometimes moms are in abusive relationships, and they try hard to maintain a civil relationship but it can’t work and the single status crops up.

Let’s always remember, not all choose to be single, with all the belief, all stereotypes, nobody wants to be in that category .

       I encourage moms to hold on,and go deeper, because God has a plan for your life and its good. This life can change in a blink,look for good that is due you. Always remind yourself that “I am an amazing MOM”.


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Overcoming the challenges

Its a new day and everyday am motivated to share abit,as a single mom one is always motivated by the strength from within.with abit of normal challenges there is always a way to face them.

Always make sure you have a spared time for your kids everyday.Make them a part of your journey.The kids are the reason to seek out a better life.

Always keep yourself near people who inspire you and bring out the best in you.

Always include your children in your plan,have them as your masters.Consider them always as your bond of directors.

Be kind to yourself,make time for you even if its just to breath and smell the air.

Only date supportive romantic partners,not the competitive ones,who will try compete with your child and work.

When dating,look for potential partners who love what you do and show it by changing their schedule to be there for you.Not all partners will want to play a support role,so find someone who has a deep passion of their own and isn’t afraid ro nurture it,they allow you the same.

Remember as a single mom,you are pulled in many different directions daily,even with all,you are shackled daily with stress.But you realise you have to work harder,smarter and longer.

  • Remember these are just a few of the ingredients il bring out for a purpose filled life of happiness as a single mom. Sharing through writing keeps me happy.

Its unshaken bond

Realities checks in when the flow of normal lifes becomes uncertainity,Each morng i wake up,walking through the streets of my beautiful city and more on weekends i get to passy by many moms holding their toddlers ,and enjoying each and every moment,then i ask myself,do we ever have mom,son and mom daughter moments somewhere cool,where they connect with the real world.

Thats what most captures my heart when i see both smartly dressed and living life out of fear.Moms are great and when that bond is nursed from a young age,then a single mom never tires from providing.today am mixing this up with a little sense of my fashion.

Single mom parenting

This might come as a suprising post, in real does anyone seem to think we’ve that plus add of being a single mom? Everyone looks at the financial struggles, all the loneliness and a lot. Yes moms know this better, it’s all about that self package and the best one wants for their lives and kids.

As a single mom remember you have to carry on with the misconception that your children are less off or disadvantaged because they don’t come from a two parents family. Go beyond that society and family prejudice and learn to keep yourself together and moving.

All single moms can tell despite any challenge, that position comes with a great reward, you get to share a very special and very rewarding bond between you and your kids, with open communication and lots of affection since you’re the only parents. Moms, embrace this with alot of inner power, handle work and the kids at your best, think of that inner power.

Look at this, as a single mom you’ve learned to rely on your self, each morning gives you the power to keep the family together, raising boys to become great men and little girls to become great moms, that ain’t a challenge because great people like president clinton have been raised by single moms. You are able to accomplish your goals only if you put your mind into that.

Look, we’ve very many great examples, you’re able to adjust yourself, get in to that favourite shape, run after that masters degree and still work full time and do that solo parenting.

It’s still that magical power of a single mom!